How We Fell Together
by k2gal615
Summary: Takes place basically at the end of Mockingjay, my version of how K&P fell together again, right after she saw the flowers Peeta made for her to honor Prim. I do not own the Hunger Games or the characters, just my ideas as to how they came together, RXR!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: After the Flowers**

I bolted to my room. I suddenly couldn't breathe. Yes, even in his death Snow frightens me more than he could have ever hoped for. I took the flowers he left me and threw them out the window for good measure. It was all I could do to keep my sanity. Snow unhinged me. Heck, by basically killing Prim, Coin did too. And right now, in this moment, I am glad that neither of them can hurt me or Peeta anymore. Peeta. I must have scared him for sure. The way I left him like that. Even if he is closer to being the boy with the bread, I know we aren't there yet. Who knows. Maybe we will someday soon...or maybe we never will...  
After that hysteria, I crawled right into bed and fell asleep pretty quickly. However, that just made my nightmares come sooner. My dreams that started with Prim alive, ended with her body scorched completely and I woke with a start to that horrendous laughter of Snow. I knew then that it would be awhile before I got a decent sleep again. Just like after the first Hunger Games; except then, even for a short time, I had the strong arms of Peeta to chase those bad dreams away. And I already knew there was no point in wishing for that again.  
I went downstairs to the smell of breakfast. Greasy Sae was in the kitchen talking. I could only assume she was once again addressing her invisible granddaughter when I saw him sitting there. He had his back to me and while I can't see my very favorite part of him, his ocean blue sapphire eyes that make me melt, I can see his strong arms that I have been longing for, his luscious locks, and even part of his smile that seems to have returned to its former beauty from before the hijack. ..  
I must have been starring too long because first Sae looks over and then Peeta's eyes follow closely after.  
"Oh good morning, dear! Peeta just stopped by to give us some bread and-"  
"To see how you were. You know, after yesterday." Peeta finished in a slight choke.  
" oh well I'm fine. " I said lightly  
"Good."  
"Do you mind if he stays for breakfast, child?" Sae asks, sweetly.  
"Not at all." I answer.  
Peeta seems to breathe a sigh of relief but I can't be sure. I steal a glance at Greasy Sae and she winks at me. I think it was a wink at least. She turned back to the skillet. Until breakfast comes out, the both of us stare at our hands.  
She leaves shortly after she makes breakfast, leaving us in a very awkward silence.  
He put down his fork briefly. "What happened yesterday?"  
I sigh, "the flowers. They reminded me of Snow..."  
"Katniss... He's dead. You don't have to be afraid."  
"I know..." I said meekly. The old him would have pulled me into his embrace but ... He didn't.  
"So..., " He continued. "What happened to Gale and your mother?"  
"Moms working at a hospital in four and Gale is in two."  
"I see...so...are you staying here?" He stole a peek at me then. I caught it out of the corner of my eye.  
"Yeah. I mean I think so. Twelve is still my home. No matter what... You?"  
" well I think so. I don't really know where else to go, you know?"  
I nodded, as if I understood.  
"So, do you want to go see the flowers?"  
I thought for a minute. Then nodded slowly.

**This is my first write in awhile. It's not done, definitely a work in progress. I just felt that Suzanne Collins left a lot to the mind with how Peeta and Katniss fell back together and I wanted to try to figure out how it happened. Hope you like, RxR :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1: Seeing the Flowers**

**Previously: "So, do you want to go see the flowers?"  
I thought for a minute. Then I nodded slowly. **

He then did something surprising. He put out his hand for me to take. Of course I took it without hesitation. Then he smiled lightly, as if to reassure me. He guided me to the side of the house I saw him at yesterday and I began to cry on sight. The beautiful roses were clustered around a huge rock that read "Primrose Everdeen" with primroses painted on the stone. And there were millions of those breathtaking flowers. It reminded me of how I left Rue.

I didn't realize Peeta's eyes were on me until I noticed his one hand squeeze mine while the other brushed a tear from my check.  
"Do you like it?"he asked softly. All I could do was nod slowly and let the tears fall. "Good. Because I did it for you." That only made me cry harder. But he did the one thing that only he could do for me, even now after he tried to kill me many times and after he has changed so much; he pulled me into his arms and held me.  
After awhile he led me into my house, took me up the stairs, and laid me on my bed. The tears were now restricting my vision but I began to sense he was leaving so I reached out and grabbed him and begged, between sobs, for him to say.  
As if on cue, as if nothing bad had happened to us since that one night, he responded, "always". And immediately I felt it click in his head. I didn't say anything more and neither did he. But I let him climb into my bed and stroke my hair, both of us knowing we were on the track back to each other. He was coming back to me. And I couldn't have felt more safe in that moment. So both of us, tired from many sleepless nights apart, we fell asleep. Calm. Happy. Together.  
Peeta awoke first. Almost an entire day after we had fallen asleep. He knew he wasn't in his own room but he was a little fuzzy on the rest if the details until he looked over and saw me beside him. He immediately began to feel regret. He got up slowly, prepared to leave and never come back but just then I began to stir and arise.  
"Peeta?" I muttered. "What are you doing?"  
" I have to go" he said, as he left the room and eventually the house.  
I walked around the house confused for the rest of the day. I thought it meant he remembered and that everything was fine and that we could... I don't know. Continue like we were during the Games? But wasn't that all for the cameras? Or was it? I don't know… Didn't I choose Gale? When I knew he would never be the same, I made the choice easy, I choose Gale... But Gale's gone and the choice isn't easy anymore...  
I battled with myself all day but I came up more confused than Peeta had already left me. So I decided to bury those emotions and bring up the ones about my sister from yesterday and to finally call my doctor. He let me talk and cry for awhile but before he went he gave a coping method. A kind of memory book for everyone I love that I lost. I decided the boy with the bread would go in that book too because I knew he wasn't coming back.  
I still had a slight hope that night before bed. I knew that I hadn't slept that good since the train to the Quarter Quell. And I was sure he hadn't either. But he never came so I just went in and out of nightmares. Prim, Peeta, Snow... Many appearances until the sun rose and there was a light knock at my door.  
It was Peeta.  
"Hi", I muttered.  
"Hi", he said nervously." Look I'm sorry he began…"  
"Don't." I said sharply.  
"No, listen," he said. "Can I come in?"

**What do you think? RxR!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Keeping Us Apart...From The Grave**

**Previously: "No, listen." He said. Can I come in?" **

We sat in my living room for at least ten minutes before he started talking. Then he finally said, "You don't understand what it's like. One minute loving and defending you to the end and the next I suddenly want to kill you. It's gotten much better since Boggs died but I still can't trust myself."  
"Peeta..." I began.  
"No! I could've killed you the other night! I could've! All the times I've been protecting you and I could've had one misstep in memory in my dream and you could've been dead. By my own hands! The very ones you shouldn't be afraid of. I could've killed you, Katniss. And I could never live if you died, especially if I did it. That's what I keep coming back to. That's why I can't stay."  
"Peeta." I took his hand in mine." I'm not afraid of you. Maybe I should be but I'm not. That was the best sleep I've had in a long time and you didn't hurt me. Not at all."

"Well I might be able to guarantee you full time sleeping if you fall asleep with me again if you know what I mean."  
"Funny," I muttered. "I do, but you won't. Well get through this together. You didn't have any nightmares with me did you?"  
He shook his head.  
"Last night?"  
He nodded, vigorously.  
"There. Your solution is right here."  
"Katniss… My nightmares were all about killing you. If I stay here, that could very well happen."  
"Peeta, don't worry. I'll be ok. I'm the girl on fire remember? "I said with a wink and he smiled.

"Well, I hope that's enough," he said as he took my hand and led me to what was now becoming our room.  
That's how it was for awhile. We only slept in the same bed. And not because we loved each other, but because we needed each other. We would go our separate ways during the day. He would go back to his own house nearby which he had turned into somewhat of a shop where he would sell his paintings and bakery items. And I would hunt. Then we could come together around dinner time, him with some bread and me with what I caught or traded. We would eat together, discussing our day. And then we would add a new entry to our memory book. We would decide who to add and Peeta would paint while I thought of words to write and then we would head up to bed. And we would repeat that routine every day. That's all our relationship was for awhile. Healing. It was what we needed.  
One day on my way back from hunting, I saw him a long way off, just sitting. As I got closer, I realized he was sitting next to my sister's grave. I found it odd because we had made similar ones for his parents' outside of his house. I never saw him even glance at those stones, but now he was sitting, mourning my sister, a girl he barely knew? I went to sit next to him and I could feel him shaking slightly and I realized that maybe this wasn't about Prim; maybe this was about how the Capitol changed him. How a tiny piece of him would always want to kill me. This thought broke my heart for the millionth time in these past two years. We have been through so much together, good, bad, and worse, but I only remember seeing him like this once. The night on the roof, before we left for our first Hunger Games together. I shed a tear at that memory from so long ago. He must have been looking at me because just as it began to leave my eye, I felt soft, gentle hands wipe it away. I looked at him and he smiled a small smile, as if he knew just what I had been thinking about, when he was someone who would always love me. I stood up and pulled him with me, not wanting us to remain in sadness. And at spur of the moment I decided to try something I hadn't in a long time. I kissed him. Immediately I felt what I felt in the clock arena again but I knew I shouldn't kiss him again, even though my entire body longed for another one, longed for just another second more with his lips on mine, in pure bliss. But I knew I shouldn't. As I pulled away, I saw him, eyes closed, seemingly trying to savor every last bit of that kiss. I then led him back in the house where we continued our nightly routine.  
As we were working on our memory book, something happened. Something I hadn't seen since we were in 13. Something I thought had just about stopped. We were laughing about something when all of a sudden he stopped and all the light in his eyes went out. He was staring into space angrily and I knew this meant he was back to his old place, ready to kill me. I should have been scared, but all I wanted to do was pull him out of it so all I could think to do was kiss him passionately. It worked. Soon enough he was kissing back. He pulled away quickly though.  
"What happened," I asked. My mind was still reeling from the second kiss of the day. Even though this one was business, doesn't mean I didn't want more. I struggled to stay on topic. "I didn't know those were still happening."  
"They usually only happen when I'm at my house. I've been able to contain it to then but now. .. "He said sadly. "That means I can't stay here anymore."  
I looked at him. "Of course you can! We need each other! Remember the one night you didn't spend here? At least for me it was awful."  
"That was almost a month ago. Surely the nightmares will be gone."  
"Peeta, the Quarter Quell was a year after the Hunger Games and we still had nightmares."  
"That's because we were in danger. We aren't here. Well besides when you are with me."  
"Peeta." I took his hand. "I am far from danger with you. You protect me from danger. Besides I know what to do if that ever happens. I get to kiss you." I said slightly seductively.  
He let go of my hand. "What if that stops working?"  
I took his face and made him look me in the eyes. "You won't hurt me."  
"I wish I could believe that." He said as he got up and walked out of my house. I began to cry. Each step we take makes us take four more back and I hate it. And I hate being alone in this enormous house. It makes me feel even more alone than I already am. Just then I knew what to do. Or, better, I knew who would know what to do. Even though it was late, I decided to go see Haymitch.

**Hope you love it!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: "You don't know how many times I've thought about asking you just... leave with me. But there are things you don't know." – Tom Quincy, Instant Star**

**Previously: "I wish I could believe that." He said as he got up and walked out of my house. I began to cry. Each step we take makes us take four more back and I hate it. And I hate being alone in this enormous house. It makes me feel even more alone than I already am. Just then I knew what to do. Or, better, I knew who would know what to do. Even though it was late, I decided to go see Haymitch.**

"Well hey there sweetheart. Isn't it a little late for you? Where's lover boy?" He said, pouring himself a glass of some brown strange smelling liquid. Alcohol I could only guess. "You didn't come for a glass, did ya? I'm running out."  
"No," I finally answered, "I didn't. Though I could probably use some."  
"What seems to be the problem, sweetheart?" He was slurring his words. No telling how many drinks he's had tonight.  
"Did you know he was still having flashbacks?" I asked.  
"Oh, of course did you think they were just going to go away?"  
"Well no..."  
"He's trying to protect you, just like he always has."  
"Why won't he let me take care of him for a change? Does he think I don't care about him as much as he cares about me?"  
"The Games are over, sweetheart. His parents and brothers are dead. You are all he has left. He doesn't want to lose you." He said, tipping his glass over completely, trying to get the last few drops out.  
Haymitch always did know just what to say. I gave him a hug and a kiss. "Haymitch, we have you too." I whispered. "Now let's tuck you into bed," I said, as I took him by the hand and began to walk this drunken, loveable man back to his room.  
I walked home slowly, thinking about what my mentor and friend had just said. And there he was standing at my door.  
"Does this mean you'll stay," I ask once I reach him. Even in the darkness his bright beautiful blue eyes shine.  
"I can't leave you." He said honestly. "No matter how hard I try. I'm selfish."  
"No, not you." I smile and take his hand and lead him to our room. The two of us change and we climb into bed exhausted. But not before he plants a kiss on my lips. I fall asleep dreaming if that kiss.  
We wake up well rested. As he begins to leave for his shop I decide to go with him to help just in case he goes to his bad place.  
It's a slow day in his shop. A few cakes and breads get sold and a few orders for paintings come in but not much more. So he decides to paint me.

**Sorry it's short but please RxR! I really appreciate any feedback and comments, please! Thanks! ReviewReviewReview!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Baby don't hurt me, no more. **

**Previously: "Does this mean you'll stay," I ask once I reach him. Even in the darkness his bright beautiful blue eyes shine.  
"I can't leave you." He said honestly. "No matter how hard I try. I'm selfish."  
"No, not you." I smile and take his hand and lead him to our room. The two of us change and we climb into bed exhausted. But not before he plants a kiss on my lips. I fall asleep dreaming if that kiss.  
We wake up well rested. As he begins to leave for his shop I decide to go with him to help just in case he goes to his bad place.  
It's a slow day in his shop. A few cakes and breads get sold and a few orders for paintings come in but not much more. So he decides to paint me.**

He has me sit in a chair across from him. It felt like I was sitting there for hours and I quickly started to get bored. But I could tell that Peeta was in some painting trance. He doesn't even notice when I make strange faces at him. I must have had my eyes crossed with my tongue sticking out for a good five minutes. Maybe longer.

I was beginning to think the painting would come out like that when he chuckled softly. "Sit still, Katniss", he mutters and I oblige for another hour. I begin to get sleepy so I let my eyes drift off for what only felt like a second but I jolt awake suddenly with a start at the sound of something crashing to the ground and not long after the feeling of it landing in my leg. I open my eyes and they go immediately to my leg. Peeta's easel is on it then I look over at Peeta. I can see him gripping his chair and starring far into the distance, eyes bloodshot. I knew immediately what this was. It was another memory from the hijack. I slowly got up and gently pulled the easel off me. I didn't want to ruin the painting and though I was curious as to what it looked like, I knew what was more important right now.  
"Katniss," he said finally as I crawled to his chair. His voice sounded far off and guarded. "You want to kill me. Real or not real?"  
"Not real." I said forcefully and quite quickly.  
"You killed Rue."  
"Not real," I choked out sadly. I couldn't believe he thought I did that. Then again, this wasn't him.  
"You killed my family."  
"Not real."  
The last question sounded hopeful. "Snow is dead."  
"Real and he can't hurt us anymore." I knew then that it was safe at least to reach up and touch his hand to slowly bring him back to me. At first he gripped my hand very tightly as if he was going to squeeze it off but he finally looked at me which loosened his grip.  
"Sorry." He said embarrassed.  
"No worries." I said standing up slowly. Obviously poor word choice since he clearly was worried. My legs give out at first but Peeta quickly caught me. We decide to close up shop for the day and head over to my place to eat and sleep off this strange day.  
Except neither of us could sleep. As far as I could tell Peeta was bracing himself for another attack and even though I wasn't afraid of him, I just kept thinking about everything. How less than two years ago I had everything but nothing at the same time. I had Prim and my mom, even though I didn't trust her to even hold my hand, in that tiny house and Gale to hunt with. And then I took Prim's place in the hunger games and I officially met Peeta. Then he announced he loved me and joined a team ready to kill me, all within 24 hours of each other. He did it all for me. He would've eaten the berries even if I hadn't. He would've drowned in the clock arena to save me. And for all his trouble he got left behind and sent to the Capitol to get his mind rearranged. Even if he would've wanted it that way, it shouldn't have happened. But who do I blame? Haymitch? I already did that. And it got me nowhere. But if I can't do that what can I do? I can't really set him straight. He's about as normal as he's gonna get. So I guess all I can do is love him. Wait, love? Do I love him? I thought for a minute. What have I done for him? Almost nothing. I saved his life in the first Hunger Games but he saved mine a million times over from the tracker jackers and then in the cave. He helped me get sponsors. Because let's face it if I wasn't kissing someone, I wasn't getting them. Then he saved me from my nightmares right before Quarter Quell and during the Victory Tour and the entire Quarter Quell wad about him saving my life as much as it was about me saving his. But still, I owe him more than a debt I couldn't pay off in a hundred lifetimes. But maybe it wasn't about that anymore with him. I stopped being concerned about debts to him long ago. Was that because I knew I could never pay him back or because I knew we would always save each other, no matter what? Probably both. But none of this means I have to love him. Except I do love him. I know that because if he wasn't here right now I couldn't survive. He keeps me sane. After everything he is the one thing that hasn't changed, well much. And even if nothing ever comes of this I will love him and need him until the day I die.  
I had finally figured out how I felt for Peeta and it only took two years! Crazy. But maybe I've loved him since he helped me. I've never liked taking help from anyone but that night it was different. Maybe because I truly needed it but also maybe because there was no pity or expectations that came with the bread. No it was pure giving. I had to tell Peeta. But as I began to roll over I thought but what if he doesn't love me anymore. Maybe after all the years of pining over me and getting almost ignored except when cameras were on turned him off of me. Maybe he doesn't love me because he knows the real me from the hijack. Maybe all this is just a way for us to cope, not necessarily anything love related. Maybe I'm all he's got left, like Haymitch said, and he doesn't want to ruin our friendship. All these new thoughts made me pull up tighter on my blanket and stay right where I was. I can't admit my feelings to him only to be denied. Then I would end up alone. After all, he's all I have left too.  
The next morning I felt very awkward. Very unsure of how to act and also very embarrassed. I showered early while Peeta slept and then I left to hunt, only leaving a short note. When I returned at dusk, later than usual he was sitting on my porch.

**Sorry It took so long! Hope you guys like it! Did you see the new trailer? I'm sooo obsessed! Can't wait for Catching Fire!**


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